Hello...again...?

I have been away from this baby of mine for such a long time that it feels almost strange to be back here. And, when I glance through previous posts, though I hear myself and the journey I'm on, it becomes difficult to imagine what putting these ramblings out there into the ether could mean. But, when I risk looking at the statistics, it seems that - even though new content has been scarcer than the truth about Nkandla - some of you are still coming back to this neck of the internet for a read. I am amazed and humbled by the thought.
And so I have decided to make a concerted effort to ramble on here more often, about wherever the road is leading me. My hope (my dream!) is that those little bits of my life's path, and what it does to the inside of my head, may mean something to you on your way this year.

Since it is only the second of January, a good place to start would be with New Year's resolutions. Now, some say that you are setting yourself up for failure by even thinking in that direction; while newer studies suggest that a New Year's resolution or two might just be the thing that keeps you more motivated and your success rate higher - especially when shared. And so I'm coming clean about mine...

I want to daily delve deeper into the peace that comes from setting apart time to sit with God and just be. To create spaces every day where I focus on God's character, his heart. Spaces where I dare to jump into silence, allowing myself to float on my endless stream of thoughts instead of being sucked in by them. Spaces where I practice getting used to the idea of me alone. Spaces where I stop talking, or listening to those surrounding me, and give God the opportunity to speak into me...not necessarily with words...


For it is only then that I will be able to truly live in the moment, aware of the wonder always surrounding me; that I will be able to find true confidence and be at peace with who and where I am; that I will be able to stop listening to the world outside of me as gospel, but rather be focused on the still, small voice ever-present in my being; that I will be able to face every part of me and not be afraid, but thankful.

I need to peel off all the layers I have pulled up around myself to try and protect me, for all they actually do is constrict me. I no longer want to suffocate because I am afraid - of myself and my potential, of what others might think of me, of feeling the depth and the breadth of life - I want to live!

What are your plans for this newly-hatched year?